Renewal

For five days my dear friend Mary sat by the side of her very sick husband as he lost his fight for life.  My heart breaks for her and her family as they prepare for his funeral to be held on Monday.  While I can’t totally understand all that this great family is going through, I can certainly appreciate how painful it must be to say good bye to someone that has been a vital part in all you have ever known for 28 years.  Love, happiness, companionship, creation, laughter, tears, struggles and triumphs.  Mary and Neil have shared these things together. 
 
For five days I have shared my tears and fears with Mr. Farish as I sat idley and utterly helpless, unable to do anything for my friend.  A double-edged sword if ever there was one.   For while my friend is suffering, my love for Mr. Farish rekindles and renews.  I am able to reevaluate all the little things that nag at me (unfinished projects, ‘snot-bombs’ …) and realize that in the overall scheme of things, what do they really matter?  Not so much.  I feel terrible that Mary’s hurt is my chance at relationship renewal.  That I am able to look at Mr. Farish and say, "I love you and I am so grateful for all you do."  Not that we don’t share these sentiments together outside of tragedy, we do, but Neil’s unexpected death reminds us to appreciate the time we share together.  We do, and we will.
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